Setting Up for Success: Keep Your New Year’s Resolution
“One thing at a time.” An excellent reminder that achieving our resolutions is a journey that doesn’t happen instantaneously.
Photo by Mackenzie Gaultier Photography. Edited by Jodi Hiebert
Full disclosure – in no way am I an expert in resolutions, nor do I think the following information is the key to success. Instead, the information provided may give you a different perspective to approach your resolution another way.
New Year’s resolutions – either reading that made you cringe and think it’s silly, or you’re excited and already planning out week three of your resolution. If you have the latter feelings, then this is for you.
Keeping a New Year’s resolution seems next to impossible, especially when a report from US News and World claims that 80% of people who set a New Year’s resolution fall off the wagon.
Side note rant – I’m not going to use the word failed in this post for two reasons:
Saying that you failed at your resolution has the connotation that “that’s it”. You’re done for the rest of 2020, and there’s no point in trying again.
‘Failed’ often comes with negative thoughts and feelings that will only hinder your attempt to continue with your resolution.
Instead, the good old fashioned “fall off the wagon” saying, I think, fits perfectly here. Yeah, maybe into the third week of January, you haven’t aced your resolution yet. However, that doesn’t mean you can’t hop back on the wagon and continue.
Why do so many people struggle with resolutions? To start, the word ‘resolution’ is a massive word. We often think quite big when talking about resolutions – a complete change, being firm with a decision, something life-altering. You can see why people get intimidated about setting a resolution or continuing with it.
Something else to consider is that a resolution is often changing a behaviour that we don’t really like. It could be eating lots of chocolate (*cough* still can’t win with that one), watching too much television, or smoking. These habits can have adverse effects on our health (high weight gain, becoming sedentary, all leading to heart and lung diseases), but often have some pleasure aspect to them (tastes good, entertainment, feels good).
An interview between Forbes and the CEO of SPARK Neuro, Spencer Gerrol, really puts this point into perspective. These behaviours we want to change with our New Year’s resolution will likely be challenging, because the rewarding pleasure from them has reinforced the habit.
So, how the hell do we achieve a resolution if the odds are stacked against us? First, we must start from the bottom by determining what is suitable for our individuality.
Understand Your Personality
It’s easy to pull a resolution out of thin air and say that’s what you’re going to work on. However, did you actually take the time to think about what it all entails? Is this resolution suitable for who you are?
Here’s an example – My name is Kailey, and I’m a chocoholic. I mean big time. Ask my husband and friends. I’ve tried so many times to cut chocolate out of my diet because I know how much sugar and other things are in it. But… it just tastes so good. After many attempts, I’ve come to realize and accept that completely cutting chocolate out just isn’t feasible for me.
Understanding your personality to set your resolution means knowing what your values are, what beliefs are important to you, and learning who you are as a person. Once you figure that out, setting a goal or resolution becomes a bit easier to reach.
It HAS to Be Attainable
One of the most critical points, I think, to emphasize is setting a resolution is keeping it attainable. Set yourself up for success from the start. There is nothing wrong with setting a smaller resolution for you to crush, and then moving forward once you feel ready. It’s sure better than setting something that is almost impossible to attain and feeling pretty crappy when you don’t reach your goal.
As someone who is legit a perfectionist (not the joking perfectionist we often here but actually the life-controlling-unhelpful perfectionist), I understand how detrimental to our confidence and our happiness setting too high of a goal is.
It’s one thing to picture the outcome; it’s entirely different to imagine the process of getting there. It’s the process that has to be realistic for you to achieve the resolution.
Have a Reason for the Resolution
One of the best motivators for a goal or resolution is having a reason behind it. Why do you want to do this or change this habit? How will this resolution positively affect your life? What will it allow you to do differently that you’re excited for?
Break Down to Smaller Goals
Another way to help you stay on track and hold yourself accountable is to break down your resolution into smaller goals over the year.
Maybe your resolution is to start working out. That’s great and all, but where do you start? Create smaller goals like incorporating a 10-minute walk three times a week for January, and then February, you bump it up to 15 minutes. March is the time to join a workout class to help push you a bit more, and in April, you’re adding a 15-minute stretch three times a week into your already growing workout routine.
Be Proud of What You Accomplish
No matter how big or small it may be, be proud of your accomplishments along your resolution journey. Creating habits is not easy, and it takes a lot of time. There’s a bit of science behind developing habits, and a lot of it focuses on the rewards for achieving goals.
Use healthy rewards as a way to keep yourself motivated to achieve more. Even a pat on the back or sharing with your spouse your accomplishment can you give that needed boost.
Learn to Love Setbacks
Now, learning to love the inevitable setbacks doesn’t mean you want them to come, and you look forward to them. Instead, it’s a way for you to accept that setbacks happen, studying them to see what you need to do differently, and jump back on the wagon and try again.
No one says you have to achieve your resolution within the first month of 2020. It’s a long process that will have hiccups along the way. The important part is not to let those hiccups derail your journey.
So, even though we’re halfway done January, you can still use the tips above to look at what you set for a resolution, start fresh, or give you the motivation to create one.
Are you working on a goal or resolution currently? What things do you do to help you stay focused and determined?