Can We Stop Saying ‘New Year, New You?’

The idea of “New Year, New Me” is a toxic ideology that needs to go. What it actually means is tossing aside who you truly are to become someone entirely different.

Photo by Mackenzie Gaultier Photography

It’s that time of year again – the last day of 2019, where we scramble to create a New Year’s Resolution that will help improve our lives over the course of 2020. You’ll often hear goals that involve losing weight, saving money, paying down debt, spending more time doing something you love, cutting out sugar, or other goals that we hope will help improve our overall quality of life. But, how often do you hear or read the saying, “New Year, New You,” or “New Year, New Me?”

I’m not going to sugar coat it – I hate that saying.

Maybe I’m merely overthinking it, but when I hear that saying for planning a New Year’s Resolution, there’s one thought that pops into my head: what’s wrong with who you are today?

We’ve gotten to the point where this “New Year, New You” saying rolls off the tongue so easily, that we’ve downgraded what a “new you” actually means. Striving for a “new you” is like taking an old eraser to a page of notes and trying to wipe the page clean, then writing over it to cover up what was already there.

Saying “New Year, New You” actually means that you’re starting 2020 as a completely new person. Unless you’re 100% dedicated to completely erasing who you were for the last how many years and prepared for any consequences that can come from changing your entire self, it won’t happen.

Yes, we often find things about ourselves and in our lives that we want to change. It’s part of being human. However, to say that 2020 is going to be the year of a new you, we’re forgetting something fundamental – who you are won’t necessarily change. You made it through life already being who you are today, so why change that in for something different?

Our Personalities Can Change…Slightly

Newer research has shifted how we think personalities work and if they’re capable of changing. The short answer – both yes and no.

Certain personality traits will always be with you. However, as we age and go through life experiences, other personality traits grow and change with us. Can you force that change with a New Year’s Resolution? Well, I guess that would come down to how dedicated you are and what kind of change you’re looking for.

A Tough Year is a Time to Grow

When you’ve thought about the “New Year, New You” saying, consider when it’s popped into your mind. Chances are it emerged during a year that was relatively more difficult than others. It was a year that really tested you, and maybe you feel like you failed at it. You may feel like it’s time for a fresh start.

Hold that thought, though.

Those most challenging moments in life are the best opportunities to learn and grow as a person. If you plan on starting the year off as a “new you,” well, you’re wiping away those learning moments and basically starting from square one.

The point is, there will also be those moments that test us so much that wiping the slate clean seems like the only reasonable solution. However, by doing so, we’re also wiping away crucial learning curves in our lives that help shape who we become in the future.

Set Reasonable Goals

So, after all this, am I saying to not make a New Year’s Resolution? Hell no.

If you’re a goal-setting person, like the idea of something to strive for over the year, and can make a reasonable goal that won’t cause you to go crazy, go for it.

For me, my overall New Year’s Resolution is to grow Aura Studio. I’m not just leaving it at that, though, because that is terrifying. Instead, I’ll make mini-goals throughout 2020 that all lead to the same thing – growing my business.

Set yourself up for success. Look at smaller, more attainable goals that help improve your quality of life. Don’t just set a goal for the sake of having a resolution. Pick something that has meaning to your life, and if you’re not feeling like making a resolution this year, then take a break to enjoy yourself.

Let’s scrap this whole “New Year, New You” mentality. Instead, let’s say things like “New Year, Happier You,” or “New Year, Healthier You.”